July 2, 2005 - Madi has cancer

After weeks of her throwing up and waiting for the doctors, I took Madi in again to the doctor. With Daddy out of the State at a teaching conference and me being 9 weeks pregnant, I couldn't take it anymore. Her neurological tests were perfect, her eyes looked perfect. The doctor did a CAT scan just to make sure she wasn't missing anything. The CAT scan showed a large tumor in her brain. It had grown quickly in her brain stem and she was suffering from severe hydrocephalus. I couldn't believe my 3 year old daughter had a tumor. The doctor called the paramedics and we were on our way to LA. I remember following the steps of the paramedic. I was lost. I didn't know where we were, I couldn't get a hold of my husband, and I didn't understand what the doctors were saying except ...Cancer. The surgeon told us he would remove the tumor on Tuesday, so we would just wait in the ICU until then.Throughout the night, I helped Madi as she threw up. Her vomiting became more frequent. I held her little body as her vital signs began to fall. I tried to get her to stay with me. As we sang "Jesus Loves Me", she drifted into a coma. The doctors took her limp body from me and sent me out. All we could do was pray. It was Sunday morning, our church hung onto every update and at this time hundreds of people were praying. The doctor put in a shunt and removed the fluid build-up. She regained consciousness and I was able to see her. Her blond hair was now gone. The doctor told me he would take her immediately into surgery. By 10:00 am July 3rd, she was having major brain surgery. The room was filled with family and friends as we waited. Surgery went well. The surgeon told us he removed as much as he could and she would now need to follow up with cancer treatments. I finally got a hold of her daddy and he was flying home as quick as possible. After the surgery, I saw Madi, she looked confused. She was in pain and scared. Her recovery from the surgery began. God had his hand in every little detail. He was one step ahead. With Daddy gone, I was only focused on her. He had allowed us to be in the ICU at the right time. With God, there are no accidents.